Are you currently following a radical path? Are your friends and family becoming increasingly concerned? Do your views occasionally diverge from the mainstream? Do you ever find yourself watching the BBC and thinking “hey, that doesn’t sound right”? Have you ever sneakily grabbed the TV remote and switched to RT when no one was looking? Have you been blocked by the President of Estonia on Twitter?
I don’t want to alarm you, but if you answered “yes” to any of the above questions, you might indeed be suffering from acute Kremlinitis.
Unfortunately, depending on the severity of your symptoms and the frequency of your thought-crimes, you could be in need of an intervention. In fact, regardless of the severity, you should seek help now. You don’t need to be a full-blown ‘Putin-versteher’ to receive treatment. Research has shown that if you allow your symptoms to fester, Kremlinitis becomes irreversible.
Luckily, two world-renowned propaganda experts and guardians of truth, Ed Lucas and Peter Pomerantsev have you covered. The dynamic duo have envisioned a targeted, anti-brainwashing initiative designed specifically to treat sufferers like you. The first step is admitting you have a problem.
Similar “deradicalization” efforts have targeted supporters of extremist Islamic ideology and have seen great success. Thanks to the tireless efforts of Lucas and Pomerantsev, who have devoted their lives to The Truth, the same methods can now be employed against anyone and everyone that questions the West’s permanent moral authority and accepted media narratives — particularly those who may have “fallen victim to Kremlin propaganda”.
It’s not too late.
You don’t have to suffer in silence.
There’s no need to feel embarrassed or ashamed.
Kremlinitis can infect anyone, at any time.
The road may be long, but the dangers are too great to go it alone. Your friends and family will be there to support you on your path back to righteousness and moral clarity. They are rooting for you.
We all are.
Note: If your symptoms are particularly severe (watching RT more than once a week, reading the works of known Kremlin agents like Stephen Cohen, etc.) you could be chosen for a new clinical trial, which is still in its early stages of development.
(Go to beatkremlinitis.com and enter your email address, home address, phone number and all your personal details to be the first to receive new details.)
© 2016 Danielle Ryan
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