The Very Straight and the Very Narrow

I see a lot of young people in my practice. You know, the kids just out of university and setting out to make their mark in the world. They seem to have a very narrow focus. Get through school and training as effortlessly as possible, find a career that pays really well with little hard work required, and walk as narrow a line as possible by avoiding anything that isn’t part of the mainstream.

I remember when I was a young person (a million years ago), it was simply not like that. Sure, people have wanted money for a long time, but it did not seem to be the primary focus with myself or my peers. Now, granted, I went to a music university, and most musicians were aware they were following their artistic passion, not embarking on a career of monetary bliss. But still, we were all more interested in enjoying our lives through a meaningful pursuit rather than one made only of money.

Obviously, we didn’t care much for walking a straight and narrow line back in the ‘70s. We had just emerged from the chaotic ‘60s and still carried a bit of that “live life free” vibe with us. The Vietnam War was ending, so at least the young men of my early adult era felt that the future ahead held more opportunities for pursuing passions—which were typically not focused on getting filthy rich.

The school years, too, were not filled with searching for easy courses (now called “bird courses”); most of us actually wanted to learn something. Sure, a good grade was a nice thing, but we were not willing to sacrifice an opportunity to actually strengthen our skill set for an easy high grade. Maybe I am only speaking for myself here, but it did seem like different times than now.

Career choices also had nothing to do with how easy the work would be. It had little to do with looking for a career that would require a minimum amount of daily effort—with the hope of getting home early so we could party until the wee hours of the morning, drinking, snorting, and smoking whatever we could get our hands on in order to reach that continual high.

What is going on today always reminds me of the culture in Aldous Huxley’s Brave New World, with the population persistently high on “Soma,” anesthetized from the emotional and physical tribulations encountered in a normal human life.

Of course, this bleak observation doesn’t accurately describe everyone. There are still kids today who possess and are in touch with their soul. Kids who want to pursue lives with meaning and purpose. It just seems less of a thing you see day to day than it used to be.

Today, there are formulas to follow. Go to school, get a required degree that leads you to a high-performance, highly paid career. Go to law school, medical school, dentistry school, pharmacology school, or maybe even an MBA so you can pursue business. Get on track, reap the rewards of staying on track. Buy a house, buy a few cars, and keep the blinders on so nothing distracts you from the formula. Walk the straight and narrow.

Sure, there have always been similar formulas. And even today, as it was in the past, not everyone can get on these high-performance tracks. If you are trying to get through high school or even college or university without working too hard, a lot of these tracks will not be available to you. It still takes smarts, and difficult tests to assess those smarts, to be a lawyer or a doctor (someday I suspect all of that will be thrown to the wayside to avoid upsetting people, ala the story in the brilliant book Mania).

Then there are all those who don’t make the grade. Those who crap out in high school, don’t go to college or University, and just mill around trying to figure out how they are going to get rich. Ironically, this is where you may find the kids who truly think and actually end up doing something useful—entering the trades for an enjoyable life of good hard work, creating a family, and finding meaning during their time on earth. But here you will also find the ones who turn to drugs, or crime, or just disappear into the dark and dirty fabric of society. (You certainly find this as well in the money-hungry ambitious bunch.)

Again, in my day, we had these, too. But usually for different reasons. Most of the kids in my time were focused on making something of their lives other than money. They wanted to be great artists, teachers, great parents, or in some way contribute to the world and to society with their contributions to science, medicine, justice, or business.

Few people I see now in my practice seem to care about any of that. Few young people I see appear to care even about sex or the pursuit of a meaningful relationship. Some do, but not like it used to be. Speaking of sex, there appears to be a strange perception of the sexual encounter today. I would have to devote a whole article (or book!) to this topic to give it justice. Sex and sexual attraction today looks to be only about an ego drive to “look appealing”—if I can attract you by being visually and sexually appealing, then I have control over you. It seems to be more of a power play and to be entirely self-serving and narcissistic.

The ”straight and narrow” path pushes out anything contrary to mainstream thought. Nothing is entertained if it doesn’t fit the formula for societal and monetary success. This simply is not natural, but is a brainwashed outcome to stay “normal” (as the agenda driven culture defines “normal”), so society does not shun you. Walking this myopic path also dismisses other people encountered who may be pursuing something differently than the all-powerful buck. There appears to be much less tolerance for the artists, musicians, and philosophical thinkers. Folks on the straight and narrow path may be interested in celebrity (“artists” who make a lot of money with their “art”), but gone is the reverence for true artists—such as the jazz musician, or the creator of amazing images on canvas with actual paint, to name just a few.

I am continually astonished at how myopic most of the young people I see in my practice are—how uninterested they are in what is happening in the world, but also how uninterested they are in more noble pursuits such as care for animals and/or the environment, esoteric interests such as religion and spirituality, artistic interests such as music or art, philanthropic pursuits, or in any sort of engagement with passions for passion’s sake rather than for money’s sake.

Strangely enough, it seems certain pursuits, such as gender identification that is contrary to biology, would not fit the “straight and narrow.” And maybe it doesn’t, but instead is a strange, contorted desire to buck the system and move contrary to norms. Obviously, if so, this is not a healthy way to do that. The trans phenomenon is unique, and I believe it is still agenda-driven, but is a combination of psychological pathology, hormones in the food we eat, the effects of psychotropic drugs, and social contagion.

In the end, today’s youth seem to chase a script—degree, dollars, done—sticking to the straight and narrow like it’s a GPS route to success. Gone are the days of my youth, where we zigzagged through life, chasing passions over paychecks, art over algorithms. Sure, some still seek meaning, but they’re drowned out by the hum of formulas and filtered selfies. It’s less Huxley’s Soma-soaked dystopia and more a self-imposed cage of “normal.” Here’s hoping a few more dare to stray, to scribble outside the lines, and rediscover the messy, marvelous chaos of a life less ordinary.

Todd Hayen PhD is a registered psychotherapist practicing in Toronto, Ontario, Canada. He holds a PhD in depth psychotherapy and an MA in Consciousness Studies. He specializes in Jungian, archetypal, psychology. Todd also writes for his own substack, which you can read here

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