It Is All Sushi

Sylvia Shawcross

I understand Easter Island now.

Those heads and bodies huge on the horizon of the islands staring magnificently out to the world as if to say “I am here.” Waiting for the ships. Waiting for friend or foe to arrive with all their foreign ways and presumptive gods and pretzels. So they can stand there on that isolated lonely shore resolute in stone with nothing to explain but who they were and that they exist. Made by conviction and faith and communal resolve. To stand in testament. To stand as stone against the moving sky and restless waters.

With the loss of Tucker Carlson from what some consider right mainstream media, the Alt media have built their giant heads and are waiting for the immigrants shipwrecked now on their shore to find them. So they can hear them instead of all those false gods in suits and ties and perfumed coloured dresses who played with their reality like a Spotted hyena with a Brush tailed possum.

And now, having said it all before, they must say it all again. For the new ones. Where once they stood as stone against the darkening tide of censorship as if to say “Don’t f*k with us,” now they say fluidly, melliferously “We are here.”

Mainstream media left and right let us down. That’s what they say. And well they should. It was never news. They didn’t do their job. Or did they? Every job has a boss and every boss has a mission. And everybody wants to get paid.

Sometimes we forget who said something that made us think but someone I wish I remembered said although it is probably common knowledge now that it was a lie to say governments were dictating to the media. That in fact, it was the media dictating to the government. I wish now I’d never listened to whoever the hell said that because now when I choose to think about this I’m left all cynical and outraged and somewhat annoyed.

Well of course that’s true. It was as clear as the nose on your face and the mole on your nose and the hair on the mole on your nose and the spiked-up DNA in that hair. Why ever did we not see it? We need new glasses. But then, maybe thats not true either. Maybe there are no noses for those glasses. What do we really know? If reality is supposedly all just constructed imagination. We can all pretend the military industrial complex and the banksters aren’t running the whole show that way.

Anyway… the whole point is pretzels are better for you than donuts.

For that reason we will pick the donut over the pretzel every time. It has icing sometimes and gooey innards and also it is easier to swallow. This is why alt media better be sweet over salty right now. If they want to be heard. This is what I think and I don’t often do that anymore. It is far too difficult. Yeah, the truth of today is ugly but the promise of a future can be constructed. Good or bad. Take your pick. Also, just so you know, those great big things on the top of the Easter Island heads were obviously jelly donuts.

But never mind all that. I’ve figured out a way to watch the United Nation sessions and instead of outrage, fear, horror and sadness there is fun. You’ll have to slightly change the way you do things but it is not difficult, even for a luddite such as myself. You turn off the sound and turn on closed captioning and presto! It’s a whole new world. This is particularly fun for UN sessions as apparently Artificial Intelligence doesn’t actually translate in all cases but makes up words in English directly for foreign language pronunciation. And this apparently is what we might have to look forward to until AI figures out what it is doing. Well… we hope it will maybe.

The worst-case scenario is if AI actually believes this is real data and starts running the world accordingly.

Just yesterday I was watching Lavrov discuss how “gorillas like Ionian boots” and that “veranda yeast” is a problem with Ukraine and “until kittens erode” there will be no peace. This is obviously also the problem in China he explained whose “gelatin coughs” were causing problems with the storage and distribution of “pumpkin potash.” And all those Russian reporters excluded from the meetings were put on the “soapstone admissions list,” which caused “a hippo’s dream.” And “so”, said Lavrov concerning the world situation and according to closed captioning, “so it is all sushi.”

And there you have it: So it is all sushi.

Here’s an earworm:

There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.”
Albert Einstein

PS. And yes I used the word “melliferous” as in “a plant which produces substances that can be collected by insects and turned into honey” to illustrate potential roles for Alt media intentions but maybe that was way too obtuse come to think of it. As it all is, if it isn’t sushi.

Syl Shawcross lives in Canada. Subscribe to her sub stack or send her an email to complain viciously, maliciously or mellifluously or melliferously if needed.

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