I understand Easter Island now.
Those heads and bodies huge on the horizon of the islands staring magnificently out to the world as if to say “I am here.” Waiting for the ships. Waiting for friend or foe to arrive with all their foreign ways and presumptive gods and pretzels. So they can stand there on that isolated lonely shore resolute in stone with nothing to explain but who they were and that they exist. Made by conviction and faith and communal resolve. To stand in testament. To stand as stone against the moving sky and restless waters.
With the loss of Tucker Carlson from what some consider right mainstream media, the Alt media have built their giant heads and are waiting for the immigrants shipwrecked now on their shore to find them. So they can hear them instead of all those false gods in suits and ties and perfumed coloured dresses who played with their reality like a Spotted hyena with a Brush tailed possum.
And now, having said it all before, they must say it all again. For the new ones. Where once they stood as stone against the darkening tide of censorship as if to say “Don’t f*k with us,” now they say fluidly, melliferously “We are here.”
Mainstream media left and right let us down. That’s what they say. And well they should. It was never news. They didn’t do their job. Or did they? Every job has a boss and every boss has a mission. And everybody wants to get paid.
Sometimes we forget who said something that made us think but someone I wish I remembered said although it is probably common knowledge now that it was a lie to say governments were dictating to the media. That in fact, it was the media dictating to the government. I wish now I’d never listened to whoever the hell said that because now when I choose to think about this I’m left all cynical and outraged and somewhat annoyed.
Well of course that’s true. It was as clear as the nose on your face and the mole on your nose and the hair on the mole on your nose and the spiked-up DNA in that hair. Why ever did we not see it? We need new glasses. But then, maybe thats not true either. Maybe there are no noses for those glasses. What do we really know? If reality is supposedly all just constructed imagination. We can all pretend the military industrial complex and the banksters aren’t running the whole show that way.
Anyway… the whole point is pretzels are better for you than donuts.
For that reason we will pick the donut over the pretzel every time. It has icing sometimes and gooey innards and also it is easier to swallow. This is why alt media better be sweet over salty right now. If they want to be heard. This is what I think and I don’t often do that anymore. It is far too difficult. Yeah, the truth of today is ugly but the promise of a future can be constructed. Good or bad. Take your pick. Also, just so you know, those great big things on the top of the Easter Island heads were obviously jelly donuts.
But never mind all that. I’ve figured out a way to watch the United Nation sessions and instead of outrage, fear, horror and sadness there is fun. You’ll have to slightly change the way you do things but it is not difficult, even for a luddite such as myself. You turn off the sound and turn on closed captioning and presto! It’s a whole new world. This is particularly fun for UN sessions as apparently Artificial Intelligence doesn’t actually translate in all cases but makes up words in English directly for foreign language pronunciation. And this apparently is what we might have to look forward to until AI figures out what it is doing. Well… we hope it will maybe.
The worst-case scenario is if AI actually believes this is real data and starts running the world accordingly.
Just yesterday I was watching Lavrov discuss how “gorillas like Ionian boots” and that “veranda yeast” is a problem with Ukraine and “until kittens erode” there will be no peace. This is obviously also the problem in China he explained whose “gelatin coughs” were causing problems with the storage and distribution of “pumpkin potash.” And all those Russian reporters excluded from the meetings were put on the “soapstone admissions list,” which caused “a hippo’s dream.” And “so”, said Lavrov concerning the world situation and according to closed captioning, “so it is all sushi.”
And there you have it: So it is all sushi.
Here’s an earworm:
There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.”
PS. And yes I used the word “melliferous” as in “a plant which produces substances that can be collected by insects and turned into honey” to illustrate potential roles for Alt media intentions but maybe that was way too obtuse come to think of it. As it all is, if it isn’t sushi.
Syl Shawcross lives in Canada. Subscribe to her sub stack or send her an email to complain viciously, maliciously or mellifluously or melliferously if needed.
For direct-transfer bank details click here.
I thought this was a story about how Covid could jump from species to statues. Several of these heads are in mid-sneeze, therefore symptomatic. I also note tha they appear to be observing a safe dstance apart…
All moai on Rapa Nui face Inland and not the South Pacific Ocean.
Ah tom-ah-to, tom-aye-to.
You are walking into a hall of mirrors if you want to try and navigate the question
“who serves whom, the media or the government?”
This was on Thomson Reuters website for awhile (haven’t checked, it might still be there).
“Prior to joining Thomson Reuters, Ms. Scalici served 33 years with the Central Intelligence Agency (CIA). In her last federal assignment, she served as the National Intelligence Manager for the Western Hemisphere within the Office of the Director of National Intelligence (ODNI).”
The CIA took over a high position at Reuters?! Actually, Reuters made a new slot for the CIA:
Government Global Business Director.
And what does a Government Global Business Director do other than plant lots of seeds,
that is, hire and position other CIA agents within the Reuters organization?
Well, the website at Reuters said this:
“She is charged with the responsibility of advancing Thomson Reuters’ ability to meet the disparate needs of the U.S. Government.”
Did any of that get your attention?
And when it says the “needs of the U.S. Government” that includes the CIA itself too, right? I mean, the CIA is part of the U.S. Government is it not? (This begs the addition of more mirrors in that dizzying hall. Who serves whom, the CIA is the server or the U.S. Government serves the CIA?)
The job description continues…but I am starting to get too dizzy.
Someone has described the entire media/industry/military/government miasma as a Blob.
There is no head nor tail. It just rolls around and devours.
The fundamental importance of gender roles in all cultures is illustrated in this little legend which gave a town in Aotearoa it’s name.
The Maori name Whakatāne is reputed to commemorate an incident occurring after the arrival of the Mataatua. The men had gone ashore and the canoe began to drift. Wairaka, a chieftainess, said “Kia whakatāne au i ahau” (“I will act like a man”), and commenced to paddle – something that women were not allowed to do. With the help of the other women, the canoe was saved. Wairaka’s efforts are commemorated by a bronze statue of her at the mouth of the Whakatāne River, which was installed in 1965.
The U.K. is going to be subject to a gigantic media blitz for the so called “royal coronation”. No nasty mentions can be expected about topics such as where did the royal estates come from (answer = seized by Charles’ predecessors using their armies); how much death duty and inheritance tax was paid on the Windsor estates that are worth billions of pounds (answer = zero); why is the quarter of a billion pounds cost of this event being met by public funds ( answer = the so called royal family have never paid for anything, they just accumulate wealth); why is it okay to inherit the role when this is supposed to be a democracy (answer = coups are just fine if the establishment is organising them – look at PM Sunak).
The list is endless but expect media silence on any truthful thoughts.
The Polynesian story ox exploration is quite remarkable. They populated travelled in canoes across the Pacific and Indian oceans, settling on unihabited islands from Madagascar off the African East coast to Easter Island (Rapanui ?) off the West coast of South America. Unlike Columbus and those that followed in his bloody footsteps they did not displace lands that were already occupied. The Maori word for man is tane. The word in Hawaii thousands of miles away is kane. Obviously from a common root.
Isla de Pasqua I think is quite possibly a Central American/South American cultural thing. IIRC Man Friday was actually an Ecuadorian. And past that IIRC Ecuadorians were excellent mariners and navigators.
And, having been there, I was quite surprised at the numbers of locals who had Scottish descendents. It used to be a sheep farm. It was run by a Kiwi company Balfour and Somebody?? IIRC. They employed herdsmen from Scotland who obviously impressed the local women folk with their capacity for plaid and general Scottish personness.
The second-wave peoples of the Indian Ocean including western Indonesia are not Polynesians. The map at this link attempts to demarcate the diapora by region. The great mystery is why it all began in Taiwan c. 3000 BCE.
Interesting. But don’t the linguistics connect the Madagascarans to the Melanesians and Polynesians ? The Melanesians and the Polynesians must be related fairly closely. The word “Wai” for water is common to both cultures.
That right there is some fucking hard core shit.
That almost certainly beats my trying to keep your eyes open when you sneeze while your driving around a corner.
STPM, you are too obtuse for my tired brain today. The UN is some hard core shit is what i see. Lord only knows what are truths and what aren’t now. So we watch…
Personally I think it’s much much easier now to see the path we are on than it was 4 years ago.
I don’t think it’s possible to pick every detail, but the master plan is pretty obvious, I think.
That’s true. That’s why I might have to take a break because I’m getting angry now. And I can’t be responsible for what I might write unfortunately.
Don’t get angry, get even.
When you’re in a fight, NEVER EVER get hot, that’s when you make mistakes.
Just realise that you have an inner bastard, accept it and control it.
It’s at this point we need more people writing. We need people that can instill strength in others, because we’re going to need them.
So embrace that inner bastard and channel it, give it a crack, you might find it liberating.
I was not writing to start a revolution. I was writing hoping to bring some kindness and amusement to people in a dark world. Now I’ve found out I am as dark as everybody else if not more so. We somehow do not change the world but the world can change us. Holding on to love and hope and compassion and empathy is the biggest battle of all with all this psychopathic evil judgmental self-interest darting about like icicles in a windstorm. We’ve all been wounded. So we get up and start again. That’s all we have. It is not some naive ideological socialist nirvana they are building. It is totalitarianism. So they can…. Alright… calm blue ocean. Anybody know who has won the battle of Bahkmut yet? Or is it just who we want to believe still?
And furthermore… the only way is satire and sarcasm and parody. I don’t think AI can crack that code yet. If ever. It takes humans to do the nuance. I just gotta get there again. Said she speaking from Canada and its Bill C-11 censorship world.
Good, I’m glad for you.
You can’t have one without the other, after all, we are all the darkness and the lightness.
I find it to be the most curious thing in this universe, balance, equilibrium. Everything in it has that singular purpose. And I mean everything.
I mean angry at the warmongers of the UN who are failing miserably at peace and prosperity for all etc.
Yes, I got that.
As J. Krishnamurti once said, do not expect anything from the UN even their title is a contradiction.
one of the most criminal – if not the – and corrupt family is going to put up a show tomorrow displaying their wealth collected on blood of people all over this planet for centuries ….
and NOT word a from off-G !!
I imagine it will come after the fact. I myself don’t even want to look at it.
I have NO interest either in looking at that – I wont be able to … body temperature goes high 😉
I am looking for write up of their Criminal and Bloody past. My ancestors and people of country of birth were enslaved and died because of this family and by those who followed these criminals orders.
James Corbett : https://www.bitchute.com/video/MlzQIoOlwCko/
Our ancestors live within us still.
I heard from a friend that someone mowed a 30 ft penis in a lawn near the coronation venue. Is that true? And no surveillance cameras captured the act? Good job! The picture of the statues just reminded me to ask. No surprise — a google search came up empty.
I did actually see that somewhere
We’re only letting ourselves down to believe anything from the main stream of a system of mind control washing over us without interruption if we let it. Philanthropically colonized like any other NGO, alt-media largely is an alternative of, not to, the empire of deceit, which seems in no need of dictation when speaking in one voice of lies, 24/7.
Call it population control by which psychopathic power sadistically pleasures itself off our confusion (con, against; fusion, together(ness)), each and all subject to siege by the normalization of madness. Just look at all the abuse. It takes a monstrous disorder of disinformation to maintain the dehumanizing conditions of our captivity.
But next to no one, it seems, has eyes any longer to look, and see. My eye is inflamed from ‘allergies’ this spring as never before. Could it be from all the unprecedented climate engineering overhead? No, that’s certifiably tinfoil-hat, bat-shit crazy, warranting permanent lockdown and drugging in a psychiatric prison. Science says STFU.
I seem to be walking among stone remnants of people without sense(s) of the world beyond the separate reality of screens into which souls are sucked. All around, more and more, I see a continuing death march into the new abnormal. But for those possessed, the convid coup is so yesterday’s news, if it ever happened, as they follow the Chinese spy balloon across the sky, watch the drone show above the Kremlin, or whatever spectacle of the eternal now currently entertains audiences.
Without vision, the people perish, as other ancient art of biblical literature puts it. Hardened by lives of captive imagination, they turn to stone, no longer looking over the horizon, or right in front of them. I wonder if I’m turning to stone myself beneath the boots of the death march I’ve seen over my lifetime. It’s like the whole world has become Easter Island.
O dark dark dark. They all go into the dark,
The vacant interstellar spaces, the vacant into the vacant,
The captains, merchant bankers, eminent men of letters,
The generous patrons of art, the statesmen and the rulers,
Distinguished civil servants, chairmen of many committees,
Industrial lords and petty contractors, all go into the dark,
And dark the Sun and Moon, and the Almanach de Gotha
And the Stock Exchange Gazette, the Directory of Directors,
And cold the sense and lost the motive of action.
And we all go with them, into the silent funeral,
Nobody’s funeral, for there is no one to bury.
I said to my soul, be still, and let the dark come upon you
Which shall be the darkness of God.
-T. S. Eliot
A comment from the soul if ever there was one. thank you. i’m with you.
And now to War to war while this pageantry covers the States panic self inflictions.
For some odd reason your essay reminded me of this brilliant scene from “Life is Beautiful”…
Making comedy of tragedy is about what we have left for sanity. 🙂
If i had a translator like him I might even start listening to the CBC again!
I read little but sketched a lot as a small child so know of these places I see on America’s history channels. I’am sure or if it even matters, all good either way.
Very young I did read the people of Easter Island toiled did this, in doing so used the whole island and close proximity seas then left.
Of significance in my option is the Stones that are not completed and the blank universal lookalike gaze of Man Folly in just what can be accomplished with soo little.
Perhaps Einstein was taking a shot at Thomas Huxley for replacing “God” or “The Divine” with Darwin’s [flawed] “Theory of Evolution”. [snicker]
I think of Easter Island as the poster child for the real effects of sustainable development.
The original Agenda 2030.
Those heads probably once had enormous bodies, but once they stared thinking they were ‘elite’, they became forcibly separated from their bodies by thousands of lesser beings…
Nice Einstein quote. Thanks.
Thanks for the Einstein quote and I melliferously appreciate your use of that word and ….. everything is a miracle.
Elongated heads or Olmecs heads….
Symptoms of long covid.
It wouldn’t of happened, if they was vaccinated…
The wonders of modern medicine.
The Cult of the Medics, 9 part docu series by David Whitehead.
Find it, watch it, share it.
A great collage of information about TPTB, and a tickler for the curios and wise to springboard from.
‘Woke of the medics’ by Brainwashed Dave.
‘its the commi;s’ and Trump Q is going to save us.
So such thing said in the 9 part series.
Do you have a reference? This is a serious request.
Fauci’s doing the rounds, while patting himself on the back:
I think a small meteor is appropriate.
God ?! Are you listening?
Off topic, but always relevant.
From Allen Forrest:
I read that they may also have had a sacred role as ceremonial conduits for communication with the Gods. The Olmec culture of Mesoamerica had colossal heads made from basalt boulders. They were from 900 B.C. Or earlier and may have been representations of various rulers. All of these ancient sculptures are impressive regardless of the original intentions of the makers.
Maybe even back then there were naysayers who doubted every bit of history and insisted all history was fake.
So the Olmecs and the Rapa Nui maybe said “F**k this s**t! We won’t write our history down – we’ll build it! Then just try and call it fake, you mfers!”
They were probably effigies of dead local dignitaries, like the stone monuments you see in old churches.
Oh…“melliferous”. I am grateful that you defined it in your postscript.
I had read it as “mellifluous”.
I remember looking it up – “mellifluous” and not “melliferous” –
after John Bolton used it at the UN
while he was invoking The Rolling Stones.
The above truly happened. John Bolton was giddy after he had successfully shepherded his
Resolution 1680 through the UN. It was in May of 2006, just weeks before the Israeli invasion of Lebanon. A necessary ingredient for further war. Resolution 1680, if you had the right lawyers to read between the lines, could be interpreted as giving the US/Brits and assorted jellyfish the right to invade Iran and Syria.
AMBASSADOR BOLTON: Certainly not, let me just read the mellifluous words of the resolution in operative paragraph 3: reiterates also “it’s call on all concerned states and parties as mentioned in the Secretary General’s report.” Now the two states that are mentioned are Iran and Syria, so there is no ambiguity in what that phrase means. It certainly could have named Iran in its full four letters, but that reference makes it unambiguously clear that Iran is referred to. And you know, you can’t always get what you want, but if you try sometimes you might find you get what you need.
UN NATO Coalition NATO Forces You were there..war scribble 8 dollies imo.
I was greatly gifted by God: I have no facility for foreign languages. I learned a smattering of French in college: just enough to confuse the word for homosexual with the word for rug – I told the teacher I would like a lot of homosexuals on my floor. He acted out what I had actually said – very convincingly.
I also learned a bit of Portuguese in the 10th grade at the Escola Americana do Rio de Janeiro – which was probably run by Free Masons (I must ask commenter Edwidge to research that).
My point is this: if I ever watch a UN session I would insist on hearing it all in foreign languages so I can smile and pretend they’re actually saying something worth hearing.
The problems for you Howard is refusing to accept damaging social effects from your own individual investing defaulting currency economic, impacting the Whole of Western Europe. I mean you live where you are now living owning to the British Isles and our United Kingdom’s Monarchy.
I’am just curious as to why your not more realistically balanced given the opportunitiy with the US Dollar and The Royal Mint Sterling Standards.
Is it over NEWS Reporting Ethics if it is you need not worry, that’s for others I hope you understand.
I think I understand this now. Is Clive an early version of ChatGPT?
Ha ha ha 😂
Grow up Jew. the Web isn’t yours dummy.
Ok, this nonsense and the above nonsense aren’t acceptable. Please submit basically literate comments and don’t use Jew as ad hominem. Tbh I don’t know which offends me more.
I don’t care if I’m talking to chatGPT’s evil twin who’s chained in an IT basement somewhere, or just to a normal, regular troll, but either way, it’s a poor show. Your comments will be scrutinised more closely from now on. A2
ChatGPT can be hurt.
I’ve had my suspicions for some time now. I never responded to “his” comments because I couldn’t make any sense of them other than a feeling of some inchoate hostility.
If what you’re trying to say (and I think I’ve just explained my deficiency in interpreting foreign languages) is that, being American, I am in part responsible for all the horrors the USA has inflicted on the world, I would have to agree with you.
The mere fact that I have not sought power or wealth does not exonerate me from a portion of my country’s guilt. I don’t live in a slum (yet, anyway) in part because so many others around the world do live in slums.
Which means you must apologize, and if necessary down on your knees and ask for forgiveness to show you are not one of the bad guys, but you are different.
Ok you made a choice to jump out of the closet on this site, but pls dont break our hearts again.
Information pheromone trails used to steer group behavior, using digital-token incentives running on inter-operable digital DLT (distributed ledger technologies).
Don’t think there is such a thing as ‘alt-media’ Sylvia – its just media.
Alt-media is like ‘Schrodinger’s Media’ – the fact it exists is evidence of ‘angle’.
“The best way to control the opposition is to lead it ourselves” – Lenin.
Thank you, yes, it’s a Limited Hangout
This comment sums it up nicely ~
Still, I am grateful for the role he has played in prodding so many Americans out of their slumber
I get exactly the same feeling with the latest ‘Epstein revelations’ now on Redacted with Whitney Webb.
Feels like a managed release or controlled explosion. A drip here a few details there but don’t dare ask the really big questions…?
I don’t get that impression of Whitney. Ask her to research and report on whatever you think she’s missing. Bet she’d be thrilled to make a full report.
We’ve reached the “trust no one” stage of the propaganda war methinks
Indeed, I think a lot more folks are aware that it is all kayfabe
Or, as the ever-eloquent Mr Lavrov puts it, “It Is All Sushi”.
“I’ve figured out a way to watch the United Nation sessions and instead of outrage, fear, horror and sadness there is fun.”
Remember, fun is prohibited, except where authorized, and under what circumstances, conditions and restrictions.
Never disclose the secrets of your happiness to the Dictatorship of the Bureautariat, once they learn of it, first, they’ll interfere with it, next, prohibit and finally outlaw it. Guard your pleasure like hidden treasure.
There’s a t-shirt! Guard your pleasure like a hidden treasure.
The Tucker Carlson thing is heartbreaking however an $800+ million out of court settlement will get loads of people sacked including PM’s and congressmen/ladies.
Its a very Sad night for us Conservatives and I sure Off G will be upset with the United Kingdom electoral results so far.
We lost a lot off Conservatives seats in the United Kingdom.
Be sure to take the correct side, out of the 2 that are offered.
Its your democratic right.
I would not believe a word about the 3/4 billion $ payment to Dominion. The Fox shareholders and the Dominion shareholders are essentially the same people. I suspect it is all a load of cods, played out to make the twits believe that there was no ‘foul-play’ with the dubious election process. Oh, there will be fiat-money changing hands from one part of the Fox Network to another part of the same Conglomerate. The kabuki theater needs to be jazzed-up for the gullible plebs out in Lah-lah Land.
They are both owned by Blackrock and Vanguard.
So Carlson show on Fox news never mentioned any truths.?
So why does David icke recommended him then…
A small point of contention for your essay. The statues on Easter Island do not look out to the rest of the world. They look inward, towards the center of the island.
Oh hell…. now what can I do? oh well… let’s just pretend then. sigh….
Actually, in my defence I only said they were looking out at the world which could be the island as well…. So I could be forgiven. And I might have to stop obsessing now because that is what happens sometimes…. The point is, now I know the heads are pointing inwards which begs the question as to why but I’m sure some social archeologist has that figured out.
Rapa Nui is a warning . A microcosm of what overpopulation does , and is now doing globally , and so called Climate Change is a form of pollution caused by human overpopulation that is devolving our species as the now global population bomb continues to detonate.
Before the plethora of downvotes hit your comment (because you dared mention overpopulation), I suggest everyone here in this forum do as I did last evening and watch YouTube videos about slums in Accra, Ghana; Lagos, Nigeria; and Rio de Janeiro, Brazil (I know: I’m weird!).
Not weird, just uninformed. And thats the sad story of all the sheep that runs with a half truth which in real life is a lie.
Everything you see on Internet is a fragment of reality, manipulated or not, and therefore always a false picture.
You can only get a true picture by being there, and you can only find the causes of slums by knowing history and how politics locally made it so.
Gandhi quote: There is plenty of everything here for everyone, but not for the greedy few.
And thats why “overpopulation” get a lot of down votes.
There is fantastic wildlife in many African countries. Practically nothing in the West. Western consumerism is very destructive. Population is one axis. Consumption is the other. The average Westerner consumes 50 times as much as the average African. The Africans ,the Indians, the Chinese and many others have been urged to have fewer children for a century or more. Westerners however have been urged to procreate.
Apparently, Jared Diamond was misleading us in his famous book. Capitalist monsters simply kidnapped the natives to work in mines on the S. American mainland.
Keeping an eye on the population. They didn’t have cctv back then.
No. They were facing the shopping mall, waiting for the natives to bring their ritual sushi snack offerings. Don’t you know anything?
Ho,ho, by the way,your essay is very….fermenting. I was imagining it growing exponentially, consuming all the posts on offg, then the whole internet, then yeasting up all the think tanks and their bureaucracies, bubbling them up gorgeously ’til they all went pop and low and behold the gleaming earth lay before us unobscured by the miasma of rancid thought.
oh where would we be without rancid thought to complain about? TY Nixon 🙂
Archeologist or anthropologist?
oh one of them thair types. 🙂
Not nitpicking Syl, just askin.
I’ve never heard of social archeology.
Thank you for your unique perspectives. Keep em comin.
Well I’m far from perfect and tend to assume others know more. 🙂 Thank you Johnny.
oh gawd, i’m using the 🙂 too much… but I am smiling as I write so what is a person to do? Don’t answer that.
Its a metaphor, she could have just as easily have said they “may as well be looking out to sea”…and her point would still be made.
With approximately 1000 of those ‘heads’ spread around the perimeter of the island, maybe they were placed there to frighten off potential invaders?
Now THAT’S an idea!!
We could mount the heads of the Great Covid Coup on poles around our major cities, and it might scare off any imitators.
Now, who to start with _ _ _
Or should that be, WHO to start with?
Maybe they were just monstrously oversized garden gnomes.
I’m going with this explanation. It’s by far the best so far.
Dear god in heaven, both pretzels and donuts are horrifically unhealthy substances masquerading as “food.” If you eat either one exclusively for a seven days, you will (quite literally) die.
Yes. Yes. Of course. But its just a metaphor sort of. I could have picked tofu and crickets.
Also the word pretzel is kind of funny. As far as a word can be funny. Pretiolas or little rewards according to the History of Pretzels because apparently someone actually researched and wrote about such things. They are shaped like little children with their arms crossed in prayer according to one history. But still…. i coulda used tofu and crickets to be politically and sociologically correct and i didn’t for which I must profoundly apologize.
Given the wretched condition of most soils (thanks to endless chemtrails floating down to the ground), pretty soon veggies and fruits and nuts and the like will only be “food” in a museum.
My gawd, we’re all such bundles of joy these days…. lol