The Exceptional Nation…

a satire by Terje M

BERLIN,December 17, 1954

The struggle for power in the ruling elites continues unabated after the official loser in the elections for Chancellor last month refuses to concede. Speculations abound about a ‘constitutional coup’, where the Party representatives will overrule the people’s suggestions.
Eva Braun (42) suffered a setback in her quest to be the first female Chancellor, after her loss to Hermann Goering (61), the former minister for aviation, last month. People close to her have stated their displeasure at the result, and have more than hinted that they would seek to overturn the result.
Her campaign was severly impacted by the exposure of several scandals. Leaked documents showed her hobnobbing with leading industrialist for support and funding, reminiscent of her husband’s infamous speech to a similar assembly of industrialists and bankers in 1932, before he got elected. Her husband is widely regarded as a controversial Chancellor with a difficult legacy. Even so, the couple are known for their long-standing charitable activities. The former Chancellor’s kindness to animals is legendary, and together they manage the biggest animal welfare foundation in the country.
“To claim that poglavnik Ante Pavelić of Croatia or ministerpresident Quisling of Norway have a special interest in animal welfare in our country, is simply not credible. This is money in exchange political influence. That makes her accusations against us blatant hypocrisy,” said a spokesman from the Goering-campaign. As a proof of this, he pointed to the fact that donations to this foundation had virtually stopped since she lost the election.
Mrs Braun declared that she is the rightful Chancellor and that her opponent, Hermann Goering, only won thanks to “Bolshevik propaganda and secret gold from the Kremlin”.
“I am the people’s choice,” she declared. The influential think-tank, the Horst Wessel Foundation, with close connections both to the Braun-couple and the military, published the conclusion of their research into the subject:

The strong resistance against Mrs Braun from all over the political spectrum is inexplicable. There is a single force behind all her critics; they all speak from the same playbook. All our opponents are paid by Kremlin gold. Any other explanation is impossible.

Goering-supporters have accused media of being too favourable to Mrs Braun. Mr Goering, a former fighter ace, has enormous support amongst the rank and file of the police and armed forces. He relied more on street-based activities to get his message across. Goering regularly promises to “put Germany first” and extols the virtues of ordinary Germans. He is in favour of registration of certain religions in a special database and stamping their passports with a special letter to designate their status. How this is different from the present state policy, where this is done half in secret by the Homeland Security apparatus, is unclear.
Mr Goebbels, Minister for Public Enlightenment, whose responsibilities includes the press, denied accusations of media bias. “The press does not suffer from any form of Gleichschaltung. Newspapermen are able to make up their own minds. That they all come to a similar conclusion just means that it is probably true. Maybe the Reichsmarschall is a secret Bolshie agent who corresponds with the Kremlin in secret code?”
Mr Julius Streicher, now editor-in-chief of the Völkischer Beobachter, the unofficial ‘newspaper of record’ says:

We keep our focus on the most important subjects. Secret Red influence is one of them. If one of the candidates have serious character flaws, we will – rightly – write about them. The contents of stolen documents are something we are too high-minded to even mention.

Mrs Braun has considerable support from the top brass of the armed forces and security services. Several leading generals and the former chief of the secret police have declared their support for her. Her promises of what in effect would be a direct confrontation with Soviet Russia is a popular policy amongst the top echelons of the security state.
The German army has for several years prepared a ‘pivot to the east’, popularly known as Drang nach Osten, where it has deployed forces in several of its main allies in Eastern Europe, right on the Russian border. Officially this is only on a ‘rotating’ basis, but the Kremlin sees this as a hostile move. “One moment they are there, the next they are not. Why should they worry? It is not like we are planning to attack,” said Mrs Braun in an interview. According to public strategy papers from the general staff, a – hypothetical – war will be a relatively quick and clean affair, over in six weeks, or at maximum, two or three months.
Braun-supporters fear a change in German foreign policy if Mr Goering should manage to avoid the last formal hurdles before he gets sworn in. In addition to the deployment of forces around Russian borders, she is a vocal supporter of pro-German movements all over the world, in what leading academics like to call “the German century”.
After the coup in Ukraine two years ago, the relations between the Soviets regime and Germany have reached a nadir. Russian state media has accused Germany of having overt designs to dominate Ukraine and the Black Sea region. In his memoirs, the former Chancellor, husband of Mrs Braun, who still has a huge influence on German policy, even envisaged the Crimea, which he called “Gotenland”, as a German province.
In addition, the Russians are accusing the German army of supplying ‘weapons, financing and training’ to extreme right wing militias in Ukraine, either directly or through intermediary governments like the extremist Ustaše in Croatia.
“There are moderate Nazis, who are so moderate that you can invite them into your home, and then there are extreme Nazis” explains a political analyst, who wishes to remain off the record, from the Joseph Goebbels Political Research Center in Kiev .”The extreme groups are a small minority. Just ask them the question straight out: ‘Are you an extremist or are you a moderate?’. You will see that more than 99% will answer they are moderates.”
The outspoken, some will say bombastic, Mr Goering is generally seen as less hostile to the Soviet regime. Yet he is no dove. He has pledged to considerably increase armaments spending, with promises to “make Germany great again”. “When was the last time we actually won a war? We seem to lose one after another” asked the Chancellor-elect rhetorically.
He also wants Germany’s allies to pull their own weight. He points out that the German armaments budgets is many times as large as any of it’s allies. He insists they should increase their budgets:

At the moment, we defend them from the Asiatic hordes for free. They should contribute to defending European civilization themselves. If we do the hard work, they should at least buy more of our weapons.”

The jovial Reichsmarschall, a former fighter ace, is nowadays mostly known mostly for his ability to make money. He is seen as the business candidate. In addition, his magnificent mansion Carinhall and his love of hunting, resonates with common people, who likes his aura of a winner.
Mrs Braun prefers a softer approach. In a speech at Ramstein Air Base, from where Wehrmacht operations in Africa are conducted, she declared:

We are, as a matter of empirical fact and undeniable history, the greatest force for good the world has ever known. … security and freedom for millions of people around the globe have depended on Germany’s military, economic, political, and diplomatic might.

She went on to declare she was “influenced by my many years of experience in the Chancellery, watching my husband deal with serious challenges to our nation.”
Ultimately this unseemly fight does not matter. Both candidates are solidly positioned within the ruling structures. The system remains the same. Both candidates agree that Germany is “the exceptional nation”, with the right to be the world’s policeman. They both want to establish “full spectrum dominance” to keep German peace, the so-called Pax Germanica, all over the world. “We are a master people, and other peoples should be grateful that we are committed to the present world order” as Goering said in the second debate between the candidates.
But as a political analyst has said, “There is only one party in Germany, the Property Party … and it has two right wings.” In the end, big money and the military/security complex will probably make sure that our next leader will heed their advice.

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